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Lindsay Lohan may be pregnant, fetal alcohol syndrome on the rise...


Then why am I the one throwing up every morning? Oh wait, that's right, my drinking problem.

So, the new hot rumour is that Lindsay may now be preggers. Oh the humanity. I think I saw this before in a movie, was it 'The Nativity Movie' or 'The Omen'? I can't remember if Lindsay will be giving birth to Jesus or Satan. However, if this chick is pregnant I'm going have sex with a corpse, because the world is ending anyway, so mine as well throw caution to the wind and go out with a bang (so to speak)!

So here's what we know: lately Lindsay has been wearing maternity tops and is putting on weight...sounds like every girl I dated in the early 90's (damn flannel). And since it seems to be a trend in Hollywood to get pregnant I would not put it past her. More babies = more Oscar worthy roles. I'll admit, this seems to be a stretch - but if it's true I feel for that kid.

To the man who may be the baby daddy out there: fake your own death bitch! You're screwed!