POP CULTURE PUNDIT - The Latest Gossip and News About Your Favorite Celebs

Jesus Cruise is insane

Stepford Housewife, Katie Holmes is about to start filming her newest cinematic crap-tacular "Mad Money" in a few weeks. And it seems that they got Katie in a two-for-one deal, as Tom Cruise wants to be there so he can provide "acting guidance" to his wife:

A rep for Cruise and Holmes wasn't available for comment. The insider added, "Katie's agent, Hylda Queally, chose this role for her because it is a female buddy movie. There is no love interest and she wouldn't be kissing anyone or have a sex scene." Holmes gave up her role in the upcoming "Batman" sequel, and some in Hollywood said it was because of the romantic scenes she would have had with Christian Bale. Cruise was said to be upset over her sex scene in last year's "Thank You for Smoking" - which was mysteriously missing during several festival screenings.

According to the 'insider' that was the determining selection factor between Mad Money and Batman, the fact that it had no love scenes. Finally I agree with Tom, when I'm married I'm going to keep my wife chained in the basement just to make sure no guy ever even looks at her. You know, to compensate for my hidden homosexuality, extremely minuscule manhood and total lack of sucess in breaking into the consumer time machine market.